Girls Weekend: International Edition

Some nights, are meant to get insanely crazy with your friends and live life to the fullest!  


Girls Weekend.

Two words that anyone, no matter what love level you are living in can appreciate.  These are the times when high pitched screaming is not only accepted but encouraged.  When your wardrobe grows exponentially. And when you completely forget what your real life is Monday through Friday. All due to this drug of love friendship, or maybe the actual drugs you take together. Who’s to say.

This specific girls’ weekend is taking place in Mexico to celebrate mine and another friend’s recent birthdays.  

Traveling with loved ones is the quickest way to define your relationship. I have had men fall in love with me due to one single trip together.  Same goes with friendships. Friends that successfully travel together, stay together.

The trip starts out a bit rocky after we pass through the border.

Cell service is limited and since we are all cheap as fuck, we have decided that we will hold out for the free WiFi at the house.  This causes us to resort to the navigation ways of our ancestors: maps.

Remember the days when you would go on and print out your directions?  Its like that, except worse because you are in a foreign country and all road signs are in Spanish.

The 6 years of Spanish I took in school were no help since the majority of the time I was either high or asleep in class. Oops..

One wrong turn and we are suddenly driving down the street of a small Mexican town hosting some kind of a farmer’s market.  There are pop-up tents to our left, and our right. Women and children are running in between and all around. I am now driving about 4mph attempting to get out of the way as the road is narrowing with each tent getting larger and closer together.

We all lock the doors (this car is 100% manual, and actually fits into the surroundings quite well) as eyes begin to peek into the car windows. What stands out about this car is the fact that inside are 4 blonds and 1 redhead wearing Jackie Onasus inspired sunglasses and bikini tops.  

Half of us have started crying because we are laughing so hard. I must combat the tears to ensure I see clearly so as not to hit any of the small children wandering the streets with tarantula suckers and plastic buckets in hand.

Mother earth was looking out for us on this trip, for 3 blocks down this insanity is a small alley access to escape.  

Mexico we have arrived!

Safely back on the road, we catch up to the other car, and proceed to blast Nicki Manaj for the remainder of the drive.

Our goal destination is an incredible gated community a short drive past the TJ Mexico border.  On a separate trip to this same community, as we drove past the Welcome to Mexico sign we spotted a women shitting on the side of the rode for all to see.  

God I love to travel.

This community has beautiful ocean access, houses that comfortably fit 10 girls and a local driver that we have officially befriended for life.  He drives an old soccer mom van that has torn carpet all over the sealing and blown out speakers. The exhaust coming out of this thing means it would not pass any smog testing since 1976.  

It is perfect.

After spending the day in the ocean, playing beach volleyball with strangers, surfing and drinking copious amounts of tequila we head out.  

Life would work out just so that we meet a bachelor party in the community to spend this beautiful evening with.  

The stars seem to be aligning.

I find this to be true especially when you are rolling with all your hot friends, one of which may have been strutting around the house all afternoon in nothing but a sombrero found in the guest house closet.

Perfection at its finest.

I will proudly say, my friends are not just hot, they are fun, crazy and intelligent.  We are a perfect tornado within a bachelor party’s dream. Unless they are all already married, then we are your worst nightmare.

Dinner and drinks lead to dancing and more drinks. Eventually all of us, bachelor party included, pile into the soccer mom van and head to Alcatraz.  

“What is Alcatraz?”  You might be wondering.  

Yes, it is a prison located in San Francisco surrounding by freezing cold sharky waters.  It is also the narlyest Mexican strip club in history.

We walk into this place like girls walking into a club at Vegas for the first time.  David Guetta may have been performing here for all we know based on our level of enthusiasm.  

At first glance, it seems like there is no-one really in this place.  Then as our eyes adjust to the darkness and the occasional stage strobe light pans the room, you can see small pockets of solo gentlemen in dark corners. Weaving in and out of drunken states, I begin to notice more and more lurking in the corners and crevasse of this dilapidated building.

We head straight to the front row to watch the A teams show.

By show, I mean there are two unattractive women on stage. One of which has a major visible C-section scar, with a belly that may still be contracting back from birthing a newborn.  This is incredibly sad to witness, however at this point in time we are all having such a great time the desire to save these women has been placed on hold. Our mission is to have as much fun with them as possible.

This goal does not take long to be achieved.  We all end up on stage dancing, swinging on the stripper bars and rings.  

Luckily our parents were not part of the “anti-vaccination” trend so none of us are currently at risk for tetanus or Hepatitis.  The night reaches a peak when one of our friends is stripped by the strippers and as a result can kindly pays our way home in the decrepit van.  We like to live in the buff what can I say!

Heading back to the gated community the night begins to wind down.  One of the single girls manages to find a bachelor to enjoy a night cuddle with and the rest of us head home to consume homemade quesadillas and salsa until the sun rises blasting the song CAKE on repeat.  

Heaven does exist and this is it.

One of the things I love about my friends is that regardless of whether they are married, single or in a relationship they all are down to have a good time when we get together.  No one is cheating, no one is being a Debbie downer and for that, I love them.

It is weekends like this that make me realize how beautiful friendship is.  Not every night is about going home with someone or getting a number in hopes a date or relationship blossoms.  Some nights, are meant to get insanely crazy with your friends, do things that you would never tell your parents (hi mom and dad) and live life to the fullest!  And for all the ladies in relationships, you can still have this with your friends.

Girls weekends are THE BEST!



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