The best thing to do with your profile is to BE YOURSELF. Be the authentic and true you!
The Online Profile Setup…
The last time I was single people met in real life. Can you imagine that?
Love could be found whether it was at a sporting event cheering on your mutually favorite team, at a party over a game of beer pong in a state of half blacked out consciousness or in a bookstore thumbing through the most recent Stephen King novel. Some people were set up by friends, and some even grew relationships out of friendship. These statements feel almost like prehistoric history lessons belonging in a museum next to the skeleton of a Velociraptor or King Tut’s golden headdress.
I met my ex through the gym. There’s nothing like checking out someone with their shirt off while the smell of sweat sweet fills the air and Eminem’s Not Afraid is booming overhead. Officially we met in the ocean when I was trying to learn how to surf…I had forgotten my wet suit at home and he kindly offered to drive me back to pick it up and return to the beach.
Chivalry isn’t dead…more like it is experiencing a chronic illness where society has yet to decide whether to keep the life support on or not. Chivalry has become the next Terri Schiavo case.
What is the final decision going to be??
In any case, online dating at that time was looked down upon as something only people that could not interact in society would do. Or, as Tinder would have it, a place to find someone to have sex with and nothing else. Who would have foreseen that it would become the statistically significant way relationships based in love and respect would grow?!
With this stunning new reality of how to exist as a single chick in modern society…I needed to make a dating profile.
Two close friends of mine (who each had a profile of their own) pushed me over the edge one day at lunch to make a profile. While sharing a Sicilian style pizza and pear Gorgonzola salad, we dove into an online profile creation process. Lets simply say, I was enjoying the juicy pear salad much more than creating content for this dating profile.
I couldn’t believe my life had landed me here.
Photos: Lets face it, online dating apps are as superficial as any other human interaction. You must have good photos to pull people in, and these photos must represent who you are and what you love to do.
You need to show that you are fun, kind, intelligent, beautiful, sexy, cute, sporty, foodie, funny, artistic, active, loving, could be a good mother but aren’t showing pictures of yourself with kids cause that freaks guys out, down to earth, can cook food, love animals, look great in a bikini, look great with no make up on, look great with make up on……. no pressure.
1.1: You need pictures of you by yourself. That way suitors know precisely who you are.
1.2: You need to also show you have friends, not too many solo pictures. And yes, no photos with substantially less or more attractive friends than you.
1.3: Selfies..I personally vote a big, fat, NO on these. However, see 1.4 for further discussion.
1.4: Show what you genuinely like to do. For example: If you hate hiking, do not post a picture of you on top of a hill that someone dragged you up once in exchange for a free lunch.
1.5 Vary content. Show photos of varying activities, picture styles and locations. Have fun with presenting yourself to the world! Yes, the right side of your face coming from lens angled downward at sunset are great…but that can not be the only thing in your life that is worth sharing!
Content: Show just enough of your personally to pull your prospects in. This is not a place to write a novel about your dog, who might have to move back home to live with your parents since you are in no capacity to take care of yourself, let alone a living animal.
I learned a method that people use in advertising that also works on online profiles. It is manipulative, and thus, it works.
Create a “Pro’s” list and “Con’s” list. In the Pro’s list put general things that you and everyone can agree upon. In the Con’s list, also put things people generally agree upon and then hit them with one great final Con to spark conversation. This psychologically makes them agree with you, feel a connection and want to connect on the app, and in real life.
Pros: laughing, good conversation, fun times, my family, breakfast for dinner
Cons: negative people, unnecessary arguments, high pitched screaming and brushing hair with chopsticks.
Working through these sections of the online application, we finally came up with a profile for myself. They snapped a cover shot: solo photo of me sitting at the table laughing. And the painful process was complete, I officially joined the online-dating world.
Just like Lana Del Rey, I am Off To The Races!
Place your bets ladies and gents on whether this profile will get me the winning horse!
Dating has definitely changed over the years, and is even changing month to month with new applications coming on and off line.
The best thing to do with your profile is to BE YOURSELF. Be the authentic and true you…that is the best way to create a REAL connection with someone for a potential relationship.